Your Kids Won’t Remember the Mess, They’ll Remember You: The Emotional Value of Being Photographed

There will never be another today.

I totally understand wanting to get the house looking perfect, everyone’s hair just right, but here’s the thing—your kids won’t remember the laundry basket in the corner or the stack of mail on the counter. They won’t remember the half-finished art project or the shoes always somehow in the middle of the staircase.

What they will remember is you.

How you held them.
How you laughed with them and twirled them.

Your presence is the point, not the backdrop.

We’ve been told that photos have to be polished to be worthy of keeping. But the most meaningful images—the ones your kids will revisit—aren’t about a curated environment. They’re about relationships.

When you let yourself be photographed as you are, you’re giving your children something incredibly powerful: a record of what their childhood actually looked like from their vantage point.

To them, the “mess” is normal. It’s safe. It’s the environment where every memory is made.

What they see is home.

You belong in your family’s story.

So many parents tell me they’re always the one behind the camera. They have pictures of milestones, trips, birthdays, random Tuesday mornings… but hardly any photos of themselves in the frame. This breaks my heart! Being photographed isn’t about vanity or perfection. It’s about visibility.

It’s about letting your children see that you were there, fully—holding, guiding, loving, trying your best.

Kids don't remember the “set” of their childhood. They remember the warmth of your arm around them. They remember your voice, your smile, the way you brushed hair from their eyes.

That’s what documentary-style photography captures: the unpolished, unposed truth of your relationship.

A hand reaching for yours.
A shared laugh over breakfast.

How high you pushed him on the swing out in the front yard.

Letting go of the pressure gives your family a gift.

When you stop trying to perfect the environment and simply show up as yourself, something shifts. Your kids relax. You relax. The photos become more honest—and honestly, more beautiful.

These are the images they’ll keep someday.
Not because life looked picture-perfect, but because you looked like their mom.

And that’s the part that matters.

Let’s make art out of your life.

Chanda Williams is an award winning documentary family photographer telling real life stories in Atlanta and Decatur, and she is also available for travel.